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Post by NorryC on Oct 9, 2008 17:13:22 GMT 1
A blonde woman was speeding down the road in her little red sports car, when she was pulled over by a woman police officer who was also a blonde. The cop asked to see the blonde driver's license. She dug through her purse and was getting progressively more agitated. "What does it look like ?" she finally asked. The policewoman replied, "It's small, square and it has your picture on it." The driver finally found a square mirror in her purse, looked at it and handed it to the policewoman. "Here it is, "she said. The blonde officer looked at the mirror, then handed it back saying, "Okay, you can go. I didn't realize you were a cop."
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Post by Niffy on Oct 9, 2008 18:49:35 GMT 1
Paddy phones up to book a flight...
"How many people are you travelling with Sir?"
" I don't know, it's your fkn plane."
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krawf
PX 125
Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine
Posts: 149
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Post by krawf on Oct 9, 2008 20:19:58 GMT 1
A man in a Porsche 911 stops at a stoplight and a guy on a scooter pulls up next to him. The guy on the scooter leans over and takes an admiring look at the inside of the Porsche and tells the driver that he has a really hot car. Well, the light turned green so the driver of the Porsche decides to show off and peels out and leaves the guy on the scooter in the dust. Then, all of a sudden, he sees the scooter zip on past him. So, being a little cocky, the Porsche driver floors it again and blows past the guy on the scooter. A few seconds later, he again sees the scooter zip on past him. So now he's a little irate as well as a little mifted that that scooter keeps passing him so he floors it until he is going over 100 mph. He thinks to himself that there would be no way that scooter could catch him now, but then looks in the rear view mirror and sees that scooter starting to catch up. He then decides to find out what that scooter really is and slams on his brakes. Then the scooter crashes into the Porsche. After the dust settled, the Porsche driver sees the scooter driver lying in the road and goes over to him and asks how he could go as fast as the Porsche on a little wimpy scooter... The dying man replied, "I can't really, but my braces were caught on your side mirror...."
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krawf
PX 125
Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine
Posts: 149
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Post by krawf on Oct 9, 2008 20:22:53 GMT 1
What does a fat woman and a scooter have in common? They are both fun to ride till a friend sees you. ;D
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Post by jamiew on Oct 15, 2008 7:10:42 GMT 1
This guy walks into the doctors,
Doactur, doactur, a feel like a moth.
A moth ? says the doctor,
Aye, a moth, a dinnae ken how, a jist feel like yin, ken.
Listen Mr. Booker, says the doctor, I think you've ended up in the wrong department son. You want to keep going up the corridor and take the last door on your left for the Psychiatrist.
Funny ye should say that doactur, a wis actually oan ma wey up thair but a seen ye hud the light on !!!
J.
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